Thanksgiving is behind us, and the rest of the winter holidays are just around the corner. Surviving the holidays can be tough for the happiest and most functional of families. Add divorce, separation or post-divorce squabbles to the equation and the holiday season can seem like the least wonderful time of the year. Whether your relationship with your ex is amicable, strained, or downright awful, the holidays might bring out the worst in you both. You may find yourself chanting, “be nice, for the children’s sake” like a mantra.
Try to keep your spirits bright with these tips:
- Know what is in your custody agreement. Do you and your ex have a visitation schedule for all the major holidays? Do you have the children in alternating years? Are there assigned drop-off and pickup times? Or, perhaps your ex has moved to another state, for example, and now you need a different visitation arrangement.
- Communicate. If your custody agreement does not address the holidays, discuss them with your ex. And, be sure to explain the holiday arrangement to your children, if they are of the appropriate age. Four p.m. on December 24th is probably not the right time to tell your ten-year-old that he or she is spending Christmas at Dad’s this year.
- Create your own traditions. Not spending Thanksgiving with your kids this year? Start a new holiday—Thanks-ForLeftovers-Giving.
- Never put your children in the middle. They don’t need to know how you really feel about your ex-spouse, and it is not fair to make them decide which parent they would rather spend the holidays with.
If you and your ex-spouse cannot work out a mutually agreeable holiday visitation schedule for your children or need help with other post-divorce issues, it may be time to visit your attorney. At the Law Offices of Mary Grace Condello, we are always available to help you find solutions when post-divorce custody, visitation and support issues arise. Call our Brooklyn law office at (718) 758-5480 or toll free (888) 970-6279 to arrange a confidential consultation.